Rainmaker generously allowed Explagrance to borrow her one-man tent and shared our two-man tent with me, giving up her privacy and independence for the week. Saying our goodbyes, Rain Maker and I moved our gear to the walk-in backpackers campground so that we could leave most of our heavy and unneeded equipment in Tuolumne while we hiked into Yosemite. We had devised a plan to hike approximately 24 miles from Sunset Trailhead at the northern end of Yosemite, past Tanaya Lake, up and over Clouds Rest, down to the JMT, up Half Dome and back, down the Mist Trail past Nevada Falls and Vernal Falls, and into Yosemite Valley where we would catch the last shuttle back to Tuolumne at 5pm. We would soon find out that this route was unthinkable to do in a day by day hikers, but having already hiked over 900 miles and being conditioned to high mile days with extreme elevation gains and losses, we felt that we could successfully tackle the plan. We also soon realized that hiking in Yosemite with the thousands of tourists would leave us big headed and outwardly cocky.
We were given a ride by a couple who were weekending in the park to rock climb. When we were dropped off at the trailhead, we set off, racing down the trail, energies high with anticipation of what the day held in store. Our first ascent was like climbing an endless rock staircase. We leaped up each rock step, almost running without the weight in our packs, our lungs and legs hardly even phased. We passed a family of hikers huffing and puffing up the hill. We overheard them discussing how we could be making our way up this mountain so easily. We continued to zoom passed other hikers. And so our heads began to grow. Looking back, Yosemite put me in an unattractive frame of mind.
After making our way over the first mountain, we hurried to Clouds Rest, glancing at my watch periodically to make sure we were on track to make it into the Valley to catch the shuttle at 5pm. The climb up Clouds Rest was spectacular! It gave us our first 360 degree views of the surrounding granite domes and smoothly sloped rock faces. The huge stacked white rocks that formed the peak gave the illusion that we really were summiting a cloud, each smoothly rounded and piled atop one another like a pyramid of pancakes.
The apex gave the most stunning view; Half Dome, in all of its treacherous glory, towered in the distance, waiting for us, calling to us. Half Dome, once believed to be unclimbable because of its nearly vertical icy smooth surface, is one of the most popular hikes in the country. Its breathtaking views of the valley, its deadly diving board ledge that drops thousands of feet, and, most especially, its trail's unique and dangerous design to get you to the top attract swarms of tourists from around the world. There is only one way up and one way down this masterpiece of a mountain; you must hoist yourself up between a pair of steel cables often crammed with about a hundred other people all on the cables at once, some making their way up and others down, causing a standstill thereby forcing you to utilize all of your arm strength to keep yourself from slipping off of the sparse 2x4s that provided the only means of "rest" from the frictionless surface. 
We expected the climb to be epic! We ate lunch atop Clouds Rest, watching ant sized people climb the Half Dome cables in the distance and talking with day hikers who were impressed by both our thru-hike and our day's extensive plans. Glancing at my watch, we gathered our belongings, said our farewells to the day hikers, and raced down the opposite side of Clouds Rest toward Half Dome.
Upon reaching the side trail to Half Dome, we had realized that we made the stupid mistake of not refilling our water from the stream a couple miles back. Knowing that we would not have time to go back and still make the shuttle, we decided to start the summit dry. We have seen other thru hikers "Yogi" food and rides from day hikers, which means you get what you want by subtly planting the idea in the persons head so that they have the idea to give you it, so we decided to try our luck at getting some water from hikers coming down Half Dome. As the first group of people passed us, we asked, already knowing the answer, if they had crossed a stream on the way down because we were low on water and unsure if we would have enough to make it to the top. Their response, of course, was no. Then they suggested that they had extra water to spare. "If you don't mind and can spare it, we would greatly appreciate it." This method worked another three times! By the time we made it to the base of the dome, we had each Yogied 2 liters of water! Success!
The ranger asked to see our permits and we asked how far it was to the top. Expecting the answer to be in miles, we were confused to be told a half hour to the cables and another half our to get to the top. We pushed on. We sped up the rock staircase passing more day hikers. The trail changed from stairs to a steep granite slope. We casually walked up the rocks as terrified people clung to boulders, inching their way up. One woman told her group, "They must have done this before." We laughed and told her otherwise. We reached the cables in twelve minutes, less than half the time the ranger said it would take us. We felt like champion athletes!
The cables were everything we had imagined and more! At least fifty other people were attempting to make their way up or down these terrifying cables held by poles twenty feet apart that seemed ready to slip out of their stone pockets. The poles wiggled and rolled when you gripped them. The cables constantly slacked and tightened when someone pulled themselves to the next splintered 2x4 where they could regain their footing. The steel was slick, feeling like it had been oiled as a joke to make it as difficult as possible to keep yourself from slipping and hurtling yourself down to the person below you. Letting people pass on their way down was a task in itself. The cables were placed so close together that you had to hang over the right cable, outside the safety of the wooden planks, in order to let someone pass. The process was slow even though the climb was relatively short. We hung on the cables, moving only a few feet at a time, for about a half hour before making it to the top. Luckily, the views and the adrenaline rush from holding your life in your hands (literally) made the pain and frustration worth it!
The views from Half Dome are one of a kind! It was incredible! We had some time to spend on the diving board edge all by ourselves taking pictures until the other day hikers saw our idea and formed a line to capture themselves doing the same things. Knowing we had to move, we headed back for the cables. No one was on them! We had them all to ourselves. We could go at our own pace and take the pictures that we couldn't on the way up. It was an amazing experience! We made our way back to the JMT and toward the Mist Trail. The waterfalls, although spectacular, ended up being more of an annoyance than a wonder. Being so close to the valley, the hundred foot Falls were like tourist catnip, attracting thousands of people at any given time. These people seemed to lack any trail etiquette, forming walls as they walked, failing to let you pass even after asking. They would just comment, "feel free," and then keep walking without moving over an inch. To top it off, the trail had changed from dirt and rock to asphalt. Asphalt destroys your feet!
We reached the Valley at 6 o'clock, one hour past the last shuttle back to Tuolumne and back to our gear. After a pizza dinner and failed attempts to hitch or talk employees into providing a ride, it had become 11pm. We sat outside the pizza shop, talking deliriously. I took a nap as rainmaker waited for the Pizza shop manager, who had offered us advice, to leave for the night. She never came. Rainmaker woke me up so we could go find a place to camp. She suggested we head for the Yosemite Lodge and ask if we could sleep in the lobby or in the laundry room or something. I thought that was a stupid idea. They wouldn't let us sleep there! They would laugh in our faces! Then they would know we were in the park thus preventing us from stealth camping. But I held my tongue. I decided I would play her game. We made it to the lodge. Rainmaker talked to the Night Auditor, Bobby, who, luckily, was sympathetic. He did everything in his power to provide us accommodations. Everything in the Valley was booked. He called the ranger station to ask if they had any emergency sites for stranded hikers. Site 65 was available just for that purpose! Bobby, grabbed his personal car keys, told us to grab our packs, and drive us to his apartment where he stored his tent and sleeping bags! It turns out that Bobby had thru hiked the PCT in 1999! The PCT community is so selfless! He drove us to the site. We slept well that night! In the morning, we returned his gear, ate breakfast, and caught the first bus out of the Valley and back to Tuolumne Campground. The bus ride was thoroughly enjoyable thanks to my seat buddy, Terri, who was visiting Yosemite for the weekend. I told her about my adventures. She told me about her sons, named Ryan and Matthew (funny right?), and some of their undertakings. Matthew has done a cross country bike trip. Ryan has traveled around the world and has worked with big name outdoor brands. I was happy she was so friendly and ignored my stench!
Yosemite was quite the experience!
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